Dear Moi,

Let’s face it. I am the most flawless, beautiful, talented and humble pig on the ENTIRE planet. I radiate self-love and confidence. In fact, I don't care what anyone thinks of me--unless they think I’m awesome--which of course would make them correct. I am truly the most beautiful woman/pig/thing alive. There isn’t a single person in the whole world that could convince me otherwise although--if some sort of crazy person tried to bring me down--they would get a slap across the face. Funny enough, they would probably be honored to have me even touch them!  I mean is there any other creature that looks perfect in everything? My specialty is diamonds. Sparkle is my color. Did I mention people are crazy about me? Take Kermit for example. He is great because he adores me. I am, after all, impeccable. I enjoy Kermit as well but let’s be honest--the only reason I really need him is to buy me things. That’s only partially true but it does take a small village to take care of moi. And while we’re on the subject of moi...I work hard at what I do. Or I would work hard--if I had to. My job is to look stunning, which, lucky for me, takes no effort. Huh…. well that makes my life easy!  Goodness...writing this makes me realize (even more) how perfect I am. I really needed that.

                                                                                                            Sincerely,

                                                                                                                   Miss Piggy